OFFERING SUPPORT TO LOVED ONES SUFFERING FROM MENTAL ILLNESS

Having a friend or family member who suffers from a mental illness can be really devastating. This is mainly because of the stigma that is there in our society towards people who are diagnosed with such illnesses. The situation becomes even worse when both the patients themselves and their loved ones are not well conversant with the illness that they suffer from. The mere lack of knowledge creates anxiety in itself. Well, here are a few tips, shared from the Karla Smith Foundation, on how to cope with the situation:

1. Educate yourself about the illness.

Educating yourself about your loved one’s illness is really the foundation of support. Research also has shown that education works. According to Dr. Harriet Lefley, a huge body of evidence has shown that if you provide families with education and involve them in the treatment process, patients experience a reduction in symptoms, hospitalization days and relapse. Plus, the family environment is generally improved, she said.

2. Help your loved one find and continue to take the medication needed for a balanced life.

It is essential that a person with a mental health problem takes proper medication in order to live a balanced life. Family and friends of this person need to know what the medication is, the effects it has, and the doctor who prescribes it. If for some reason the medication is no longer effective, the person quits taking the medication, or the side effects become unmanageable, it is the family and friends who often need to intervene and help guide the person back to the medication needed for a balanced life.

3. Urge your loved one to maintain a supportive relationship with a therapist, counselor or sponsor

Along with medication, some form of “talk therapy” is critical for someone with mental health problems. Family and friends can be invaluable in supporting this need for counseling and in assisting their loved one find a therapist, counselor, or sponsor who truly helps the loved one cope with the mental illness. Most often, it is also valuable for the family and friends to seek some form of talk therapy themselves.

4. Assist your loved one in developing a healthy self- esteem since it is critical for a balanced emotional life

Many people with a mental health problem suffer from a damaged self-esteem. Their self-esteem is often either too low or too high. Family and friends are in a position to observe the level of self-esteem in a loved one with mental health problems and to respond appropriately. This ability to observe and respond appropriately implies that the family and friends acquire the skills needed to make these observations and responses.

5. Accept the mental health problem as a fact of life for your loved one even though it does not encompass all of life

A mental disorder can become the exclusive focus of the life of a person with mental health problems and for the family and friends of this person. There are two stages to this strategy: 1) to accept the fact of the mental health problem – often a difficult challenge for both the person with a mental illness and for family and friends; 2) once this fact is acknowledged, it is equally crucial to accept that the disorder does not encompass all of life, that there are also other parts of life that deserve attention and focus

6. Take care of yourselves by proper sleep, diet, relationships and by monitoring your feelings

Often a person with mental illness requires special attention from family and friends. This extra attention can be time consuming, intellectually challenging, and emotionally draining. It is vital that the family and friends take care of their own needs for exercise, sleep, and proper diet. They must also devote time and energy to other relationships in their life, and to identify and express their honest feelings about their loved one with a mental illness.

7. Become a supportive network of family and/or friends who know about the mental health problem and who commit to acting in the best interest of the loved one as far as you are able

It is most helpful for family and friends to form a network of support among themselves as well as with their loved one with mental health problems. A shared knowledge of the illness and a shared responsibility for the loved one offers the best opportunity for a balanced life for everyone. This network will therefore require commitment to the loved one and to each other, including a commitment to resolving conflicts when they arise. 

8. Identify the early warning signs that precede a more difficult phase of the mental illness, and help your loved one when these signs emerge

One of the most important roles of the network of family and friends is to monitor and identify early warning signs of a change in the thinking or behavior of their loved one. Often a change in medication or the effectiveness of a medication, a stressful situation in life, a change in a relationship, etc. will trigger the onslaught of a more difficult stage of the mental illness. The quicker family and friends identify this change, the quicker they can gently intervene and help return their loved one to a more balanced life once again.

9. Acknowledge dependence on a higher power and seek guidance from that higher power in whatever way that is comfortable to you

Most people in our society acknowledge a belief in a Higher Power, whom many identify as God. Mental illness is baffling, to say the least, and utterly destructive, to say the most. In coping with the mental illness of a loved one, many family and friends know that their efforts, support, and effectiveness are limited. We recognize that at some point we are powerless over the illness and over our loved one. Incorporating our belief in a Higher Power, however we understand that belief, offers another dimension to our coping with the mental health problem of a loved one.

We hope that this helps you and we, at the Nairobi Parenting Clinic LTD, are always at your service.